(Not Really a) Review: First Impressions of Sanditon (2019)

Jane Austen adaptations are a very mixed bag. On the one hand you get classics like the 1995 versions of Sense and Sensibility and Pride and Prejudice. On the other you get abominations like Pride and Prejudice (2005). Take a wild guess which category this one falls into.

"Jane Austen's"? Really? "Brought to life"? Really?

Sanditon is a miniseries named after an unfinished Jane Austen novel. I've never read the published version of the novel, or any of the attempts other authors have made to complete it. To be honest I haven't watched the series yet either. (I'm not a fan of watching things while they're still airing.) But it's clear from simply reading about this series and looking at GIFs and stills from it that it isn't a Jane Austen adaptation.

I didn't even know it was being made until I read a newspaper boasting about how (paraphrased) "this Austen adaptation replaces dull conversations with nudity". I did a double take. Surely I'd misread that. Unfortunately I hadn't. So I googled the series, hoping the article was lying to attract viewers. It wasn't.

There are so many things wrong with this series that I don't know where to begin. Might as well start with the nudity. WHAT IN GOD'S NAME WERE THEY THINKING? This shows exactly what's wrong with the film- and series-making industry nowadays. They think no one will want to watch their shows unless they shoehorn nakedness in somewhere. Actually, nothing is more likely to make me avoid a film or series like the plague.

Next up is Charlotte's hairstyles. Take a look at that eyesore of a DVD cover. Charlotte's hair is loose and hanging down her back. Wrong. Think of P&P. How many times did Jane or Elizabeth wear their hair loose in public? That's right: never. How many times does Charlotte wear her hair like that? Goodness knows. But it happens far too often.

Apparently there are a pair of sinister siblings living in a gloomy house. Yet more proof that this isn't a Jane Austen adaptation. Even in Northanger Abbey, her parody of Gothic novels, she never seriously used Gothic themes and characters. This subplot would make sense in a Brontë adaptation. But in Jane Austen?! 😒

Why did the series-makers say this is based on an Austen novel? By all means, make a series riddled with historical inaccuracies and naked men. Throw an entire city of sinister people and gloomy houses if you feel like it. But don't call it Sanditon. Don't associate with Jane Austen. Present it as an original story that isn't meant to be accurate. Then maybe its flaws would be forgiveable.

I can say with certainty that this isn't a series I'm eager to watch. The only reason I'll ever suffer through it is if I want something to laugh at.

Rating: 1/10.