(Not Really a) Review: The Five Most Overrated Novels

After many weeks of struggling I've finally given up on War and Peace. I made it to chapter forty-seven. Honestly I shouldn't have bothered reading forty-seven sentences of it, let alone chapters. So, inspired by that disaster, I've made a list of the five most overrated novels I've suffered through.

Already reviewed here. From what I've seen, Leo Tolstoy either wasn't a good author, or the English translations of his novels do him a disservice. After being bored to tears by both Anna Karenina and War and Peace, I'm inclined to think it's the former.

Already reviewed here. Unlike the other examples on this list, Great Expectations is actually a good novel. It's just not as good as some people claim. And it's certainly not the best of Dickens' works.

Already reviewed here. The Turn of the Screw is the least frightening, most boring horror novel I've ever read. And it drags on for aaaaaaaaaaaages. It can't decide if it wants to be a novel or a short story, and only succeeds in being too short for one and too long for the other.

I can sum The Great Gatsby up in one word: Yawn. Heavy-handed symbolism, threadbare plot, revolting characters, interminable dullness... In short it has everything I don't want in a novel. Of course, those flaws are probably the reason it's considered a classic, because some people believe only the most boring books ever written should become classics.

Middlemarch was one of the books I read out of morbid curiosity rather than interest. The miniseries adaptation was so bad that I thought the book had to be better. It isn't. If anything it's worse. Nothing ever happens in the entire sorry saga. Chapter after chapter it stumbles along without even trying to keep the reader's attention. Eventually I gave up in despair.

(Of course there are many more novels I consider overrated, but these are the five that immediately spring to mind.)

(Not Really a) Review: My Top Three Writing Sites

July is approaching, which means I'm preparing for the next installment of Camp NaNoWriMo. So here are my personal favourite sites for writing.

1. Wattpad

This is one of the best-known writing websites. When I first started using it, it had a reputation for terribly-written fanfiction about whatever band was currently popular. Since then the amount of fanfiction has lessened and it's become better-known for original fiction. Unlike FictionPress and Critique Circle it allows users to write on the website itself, instead of having to write on Word/Office or copy and paste stories onto it.

Its main drawbacks are how difficult it is to get readers, and covers are required. If you're like me and aren't able to make your own covers, you have to go to the forums and ask someone else to make one for you. Getting people to read your story is even more difficult. Again you'll have to go to the forums and look for people who offer to read and give feedback.

2. FictionPress

This was the first writing website I used for original fiction. Compared to Wattpad it's easier for readers to find stories here. But it has no tags, so if you're looking for a specific sort of story you're on your own. You have a much higher chance of getting readers and reviews, though.

3. Critique Circle

This website is especially for writers who want to get published and are looking for feedback on what needs to be changed in their stories. Users aren't able to submit stories without credits, which you get by critiquing other people's works, so every story submitted is certain to get at least one critique. Of course, the quality of the critique depends mainly on the person who writes it. Almost every crit I've received has been very helpful and polite, but there are one or two that stick out as being at best useless and at worst downright rude. I've received literally hundreds of crits, though, so the unhelpful ones are a tiny minority.

If you're a writer looking for websites to use, hopefully this is helpful to you 😃 And if you aren't a writer, you can always check out the sites anyway and find some new stories to read 😉

(Not Really a) Review: First Impressions of War and Peace

Now that I have so much time on my hands I'm trying to read this infamously long book. So far it's slooooow going. (You could say that I'm trying, but I'm finding it very trying. *dodges thrown vegetables*)

In spite of being one of the best-known novels ever written, virtually no one knows what War and Peace is about. I'm almost twenty chapters in and I don't know what it's about either. It's supposed to be set during Napoleon's ill-fated invasion of Russia. But the invasion itself hasn't actually started yet. Instead of a wartime epic we're treated to the dull and plodding saga of Pierre Bezukhov, the Rostovs, and Prince Andrei, with guest appearances from some of the least memorable characters I've ever seen. Nothing actually happens in this saga. It's just a collection of conversations and scenes that feel more like a slice of life than an epic novel.

I have to say, it's a struggle to stay interested. It's even more of a struggle to keep track of who's who, who's related to whom, and who has more than one name. (Unfortunately almost everyone has more than one name.)

I'm tempted to either skip ahead to find where the war itself begins, or watch one of the more faithful adaptations and see if it can make the story interesting.

Will I finish the book? Will it become one of the few novels I abandoned in despair? Is it even worth the effort? I'll review it if I do manage to finish it -- something that looks increasingly unlikely. Until then, I'll try to get through a few more chapters.

(Not Really a) Review: The Three K-dramas I've Watched So Far

As you probably know by now, I've watched several Chinese dramas. Korean dramas, on the other hand, are a rabbit hole I haven't really fallen down yet. Here are my thoughts on the three dramas I have seen.

Goblin (also called Guardian: The Lonely and Great God) is one of the most famous K-dramas ever made. It's also the first one I watched from beginning to end. My thoughts: ...well, it's certainly good. At times it's heartwarming, at times it's depressing, and some parts of it made me roar with laughter.

There's just one problem. The far-too-large (and too obvious) age gap between the main couple. I simply can't ship an immortal man with a girl who's still in high school. Not only that, but their interactions feel far more friendly/familial than romantic. I would have enjoyed the series more if it had removed the romance and instead focused on the zany antics of the immortal goblin and the grim reaper who somewhat reluctantly become housemates.

Rating: 7/10.

Scholar Who Walks the Night is based on the manhwa of the same name (which I haven't read yet). If it stays close to the source, then the manhwa isn't very good. If it doesn't, then the adaptation isn't very good. Basically, it's about vampires. In Joseon. Fighting over who gets the throne. Insane though that premise is, it could have been turned into something quite good. Unfortunately most of the series is silly and/or boring.

Ironically the best part of it is the villain. I fast-forwarded each episode until I found Gwi's next scene. He's a manipulative, despicable monster, but he's much more interesting than the heroes. I was honestly disappointed when he died.

Rating: 4/10.

The King in Love (also called The King Loves) is based on the novel of the same name, which in turn is loosely based on historical events. Verdict: yet another series with a clumsily shoehorned-in love triangle. The historical and political part of the story is interesting. But at least twice in every episode the plot comes to a screeching halt while Won, San and Rin angst and sulk about their romantic woes.

By far the worst part is the ending. We never find out how Rin survived that fall. I'd just accepted he was dead when suddenly he reappears without a word of explanation. There went my suspension of disbelief 😒

Rating: 6/10.

(Not Really a) Review: Five Books That Should Be Adapted

Plenty of books get adaptations. Some get several. Then there are the unfortunate ones that get none. And some books that should be adapted are overlooked. This is a short list of the five (...sort of) books that I really want to see adapted (again).

The Prisoner of Zenda has been adapted before. Several times. The quality of those adaptations ranges from "excellent" to "atrocious". But the last really good adaptation was in 1937(!). Same goes for its sequel Rupert of Hentzau, which hasn't been adapted since 1964 -- and that adaptation's lost. It's high time someone made a film or miniseries based on these books. The more faithful to the source, the better.

Barnaby Rudge is Charles Dickens' least-known novel. Which is a pity, because it's both a good story and is set during an equally little-known part of history. Its most recent screen adaptation was in 1960. If people want to make a new miniseries based on a Dickens novel, they should stop adapting A Christmas Carol for the umpteenth time and turn to this book instead.

Mary Barton was Elizabeth Gaskell's first novel. Thematically it's very similar to North and South. It was last adapted in 1964, but that version's lost. Apparently the BBC planned to adapt it in 2012, but nothing came of that. I hope someone raises the idea again.

Emily of New Moon has been adapted before, but I'd like to see film or series versions of the entire trilogy someday. Unfortunately there's a high chance any modern adaptation of it will go the way of Anne With An E. I don't think I could bear to see them butchered like that. Anyone planning to adapt them had better make sure they actually stay close to the books.

All right, so The Eustace Diamonds is the third in a series. The ideal solution would be to adapt the entire series. (This was done back in the 70s, but I've never been able to enjoy 70s period dramas.) If that sounds too complicated, there's very little connecting this book with the rest of the series. A little bit of work and it would be a good standalone film/miniseries.

Of course there are other books that deserve adaptations. But these are the ones I especially want to see, and there's currently no sign that any of them will be adapted. Certainly not any day soon 😔

(Not Really a) Review: Films I Watch at Christmas

🎵It's the most wonderful time of the year...🎵 And I'm so busy with Christmas preparations that I haven't time to write a proper review. So instead I'm doing a short list: my five favourite films to watch at Christmas. (Note that I didn't say "Christmas films". They're so trite and repetitive nowadays that I hardly bother watching any films specifically called Christmas films.)

It's a Wonderful Life (1946) is at the top of almost everyone's list of favourite Christmas films. And with very good reason. Sure, it's unrealistic and often silly. But it's so cute and heartwarming that I love it anyway.

Mickey's Christmas Carol (1983) is a bit of an oddity. It's an adaptation of A Christmas Carol, obviously, with Uncle Scrooge as Ebeneezer Scrooge (what a surprise!) and other Disney characters as everyone else. By all logic I shouldn't like it at all. I've never been able to like A Christmas Carol. But it's entertaining, and surprisingly sad in parts. So I enjoy it much more than I'd expect.

Prancer (1989) is one of those films that I love mainly because I watched it as a child. Rewatching it as an adult I can see it's not nearly as perfect as I used to think it was. But nostalgia means I still watch it every Christmas.

No, this isn't even remotely a Christmas-y film. But Beauty and the Beast (1991) is my all-time favourite Disney film and one of the best fairy-tale adaptations ever made. That's a pretty good reason to watch it at any time of the year.

What do you mean, this isn't a Christmas film? It's right there in the title! The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993) is a wonderfully creepy film that I love watching all through the year. At Christmas and Halloween I just watch it even more than usual 😄

And now, "Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night"!

(Not Really a) Review: Which Pride and Prejudice Adaptation is the Best?

I'm trying something completely new today. Instead of reviewing just one work, I'll compare the different versions of Pride and Prejudice that I've seen. Which one is best? (You probably already know the answer.) Which one is worst? (Again, you probably know. What you might not know is that it has competition.)

First and more importantly: the novel itself. Without this book, none of the other versions would exist. It's the historical romance novel in many people's minds. Most of the thousands of Regency novels written since owe something to it. Mention Jane Austen and this is the book everyone will think of. In short, it's practically perfect in every way 😍

Verdict: The absolute best.

Next up: the 1940 film. Starring actors who don't suit their characters at all, wearing costumes from the wrong era and country. Features a Lady Catherine who's amusing in all the wrong ways, and a Lizzie and Darcy who are utterly unconvincing.

Verdict: I used to think this was the worst Pride and Prejudice adaptation. It's since moved up the list to second-worst.

Third time's the charm? Nope. The best I can say for the 1980 miniseries is that it's not as bad as some versions. Frankly, it's dull. I struggled to stay awake through it. Where are the memorable characters and witty dialogue of the novel?

Verdict: Not good. Not terrible. Just average and disappointing.

Finally! The 1995 miniseries is very nearly as good as the novel. I love every minute of it. I have whole episodes memorised. This series is the perfect example not only of how to properly adapt Pride and Prejudice, but of how to properly adapt any novel.

Verdict: Best. Version. Ever.

And last of all here's the worst. I've already said everything that can be said about the 2005 film. So let me summarise: KILL IT. KILL IT WITH FIRE.

Verdict: Utter abomination.

I hope you enjoyed this series of mini-reviews! (Or should that be miniseries of reviews?) Note that this only includes P&P adaptations I've seen. There are plenty of others I haven't seen. But I think it's safe to say none of those others will ever be better than the 1995 series 😄